How The Lonely Mother Can Raise Her Son's Masculinity
Unfortunately, these days there are a lot of single mothers much. Traditionally, the family, where the mother herself has a daughter, feels less of a problem, but the tandem of "mother-son" risk facing a lot of problems, as it is believed that the mother is quite difficult to bring in the son of masculinity, grow it a real man. But is this really true?
Tips of psychologists: How to raise a real man
First of all, mom should just forget about the fact that they have a defective son or family. If the father does not live under the same roof with a child, it does not mean that such a defective family, and the child will grow flawed. With the proper education of the child will grow a real man, and the mother should avoid some errors in education:
- It is not necessary to raise a child, as a soldier, and for him to try to become the "father" .tak education can make a child angry and withdrawn, because any child needs affection, tenderness and maternal care.
- Make sure the child should have a sample of "masculine behavior" To do this, it is not necessary to look for my mother "replacement daddy", the child often enough to chat with family and friends male - my mother's brother, grandfather, teacher, coach, and so on are quite suitable for this role. Let your child communicate with them more go to visit, is not confined only to his family, live a full life with the child.
- A good example of male behavior can serve as books, cartoons, movies or stories told by her mother before going to sleep. Try to communicate to the baby only the correct male behavior, and watch carefully that looks and reads your boy. After such characters as Alfonso, idlers, and infantile personality, which often ridiculed in various dramas and comedies will not be a good example, so these films should be removed from the home video collection.
- Avoid baby talk with his son. With a child it is necessary to communicate, as an adult, mangling the language is inappropriate here. Also, do not take care of his son too, it must grow independent and responsible, and your overprotection can raise only a coward or a "mama's boy". And do not be afraid that the child will move away from you, autonomy does not exclude love of mother and care for her.
- Try as soon as possible to allow the son to do something on their own. Elementary and self-care skills can begin to instill since two years. Let the kid brushing her teeth and washes himself clean toys, runs a bed, washes his cup and so on. So the kid will grow independent and learn to appreciate the work of others.
- If your child wants you to hug, kiss, or regret, do not shrug it off and say that it is "girlish behavior." This behavior shows the opposite effect, he tries to take care of you, protect and defend it.
- Be sure to praise his son for any display of courage. Conceding a girl on a swing seat or help you arrange the dishes for dinner - all worthy of the highest praise and encouragement.
- Do not try to constantly monitor his son, or to solve all the problems for him. He must learn to solve their own conflicts in a kindergarten or school, alone distinguish good and bad people, and to develop a line of behavior as those and others.
- One of the most common mistakes women is the prohibition of communication with his own father. Even if the biological father of the child is no different positive qualities, and you believe that anything good he does not teach a child, you should allow them to communicate. Later, the child himself will learn to understand what is good and what is bad, to take one example, and who is a negative example. But the child must know his father, it is very important for normal mental development.
- Groups and Clubs for the son is desirable to select those in which men predominate. Again, a further example of male behavior does not hurt.
- In adolescence, a lonely mother waits new crisis, so take care in advance so that at this age the son was next to a man who will tell about all the nuances of growing up in this period.
- Avoid imposing their understanding of child world. His vision of things - men and it can be radically different from your "female" do not try to change it.
- Learn how to deal with his son in various men's sports. First, it will strengthen the bond between you, the child will trust you more. Secondly, you will have more options for joint leisure.
- Always believe that you will bring up a real man. Trust yourself and your son, and you are sure to succeed!
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